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   Corny Old Railroad Jokes!

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Well, here they are! Some of the corniest old gags and jokes about railroad life you've ever heard! Prepare to slap your knee and bust your buttons cuz here they come! ('re supposed to groan )


LAWYER: "Did you see the automobile approaching the railroad track?"

CROSSING WATCHMAN: "Yes sir -- and I said to myself, " That sure is a nice car -- wasn't it?"

TRAVELER: "What's the use of you having a time table if your rotten trains never stick to it?!"

PORTER: " Well, sir... how would you even KNOW they was runnin' late if NOT for the timetable?"

An elderly lady walked into a Toronto ticket office and asked for a ticket to New York. " Do you want to go by Buffalo?" inquired the ticket agent. "Certainly not!" she answered indignantly, " I want to go by TRAIN!"

PULLMAN PORTER to passenger: "Shall I brush you off, sir?"

PASSENGER: " No thank you.....I'd prefer to get off the train in the USUAL manner!"

CONDUCTOR to passenger: " Sir, I must ask you not to leave your luggage in the aisle."

FAT PASSENGER: " That's not my luggage, my good man.....that's my LUNCH!"

MAN: "Well, I can see that there must be a train around here somewhere."

WIFE: "What makes you say that, dear?"

MAN: " Because it left its TRACKS behind!"

What did the Mama Steam Engine say to her Baby Steam Engine at supper time?

"Choo choo!"

Question: Why do Y6's not swim?

Answer: How could you get a 2-8-8-2 in a bathing suit?


Copyright© 2005 Erik Sansom